Like checking in with someone. Except that someone isn’t always around. Except that someone isn’t always able to sit down with you. Play a game with you. Except that someone is busy finding themselves in this place. On the surface.

When we make a surface like we’re ready to play. When we sat down the chessboard. Or sat down to it in the park. Where were trans in public. And all of our pieces are math puzzles to everyone else. When we know we can connect in this way.

Just has a sort of way. To talk about what we love. What we are what we are to others what we want what we want from others. Simple. Understood. I could have written this differently.

I could have said things in The voice people like the best. I’m tired of The voice. I’m tired of saying things in The voice. So I make my feelings words. I make pieces of my gender in its current form 16 aspects. Half of them wrote concepts. The other half astral engagement. The ponds simple actions I take to feel trans. The nights in Bishops more spiritual ways I find my trans self connecting with something in the world.

The other side of the board the other side of the chest board. The gender I am tomorrow after the game after meeting this person that’s not always available. This person that isn’t always around. The person I’m looking to be. Sometimes I just feel tired of exacting myself into the world.

Meadow chest.

This is just a game for me to play sometimes when I want to explore what I am. Without having to create any more complex of a shrine than a chess board. I can just name each piece and when that piece sticks an action to the world I can receive the question that bubbles like sap from the piece and it’s interaction with the meadow it is in.

And when we put the board away the meadow is gone forever in that way without a bored state kind of mind state to preserve it. And so when it’s brought up again and even if it’s brought up again I know all the pieces are restored to last noon positions their last known physicians they take a sort of breath. And that breath knows this Meadow is not the one they were last engaging with.

Something about the people playing. But like the pieces know they’re being moved by people. Like the pieces would know. I don’t think they would know even if you whispered it into the ear of a pond moving in to the next tile. Moving from column A to column b to take some peace out of the world or make some like it was the simplest thing like it was with the pawn was made to do.

I might add more to this later. The trans-story jam it’s been a wonderful experience. I think there is a lot of joy in this game. But most of the joy is just like personifying all of the chess pieces. It’s all in like oh here let me give you a basic function and a personality and a creature that you won’t create or all create together by interacting like cells composingthey being babying you all treating you like beautiful little things.

Cuz you are you are beautiful little things in every step you take. And every step you take has a little joy in it where I see it and I smile and I say oh that’s here oh they’re here we’re so messy joyful deserving of love and all it’s aspects.

Bye thanks bye